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Friday, July 10, 2009

...And A Diet Coke

I hate starting these things out with apologies, but given the dearth of entries lately, I feel like I should.

So I'm sorry. There. I said it. I'm sorry I haven't been blogging and I'm sorry my life just hasn't been that interesting lately. I've also been "hanging out" with Facebook a lot, which has been, therefore, getting more play with my photos, etc. I'll try and be better.

Apology Over.

Time for the real reason for this post.

I went to the grocery store twice this week. Note* This. Never. Happens. Twice in a month...much more likely. I'm a fickle grocery store goer.
My attendance at the market, however, has been a good deal more regular as of late because of Safeway's sweet gas discount and the fact that they just put in a gorgeous new store that just happens to be on my way home from work. Fab.

So, I've started doing my grocery shopping on Mondays. I make my list towards the end of the work day, and then on my way home I stop in, get the week's supplies, and don't worry about it for the rest of the week. It's a pretty good system, if I do say so myself.

So, with my renewed commitment to regular grocery runs, I've also been making a concerted effort to only buy and make really good healthy food. I love this, and it makes me feel like a real human being, instead of a college student eating ramen on my couch for the third time in a week...not that I would still ever do that at 26...ahem....

Anyway

So I made my weekly grocery run on Monday. Things I bought included fresh spinach, strawberries, tomatoes, bell peppers, snap peas, whole grain pasta, fresh fish and hummus. I felt so proud as I pushed my little cart full of actual adult human food through the store. Lovely.

On Wednesday, I had to make a grocery run to prep for a party that I am helping to throw for one of my best friends. She is turning 25 and so we decided to have a "Young At Heart" party. We themed it around all those great 80's and 90's morning cartoons, are setting up a Slip n' Slide, and there may or may not be a shaving cream fight.

For food, we decided to have kid stuff. Popsicles, watermelon, cake, etc. Since I was in charge of food, and was looking at a full schedule for the rest of the week I decided to get it done a few days early. Also, I needed to fill up my tank and was just a few dollars shy of my $.20 gas discount. Bless you, Safeway.

So, I went to the grocery store. This time I was much less proud of what ended up in my cart. Popsicles of 3 or 4 different varieties, chocolate pudding, Oreos, Cool Whip, gummy worms, a huge bag of mixed candy, chips, salsa, cream cheese, sour cream, and a frozen pizza (okay, that last one wasn't for the party, but a girl has to be prepared for the unexpected). I felt fatter just looking at the stuff, and prayed I wouldn't run into any really attractive looking fit people...they would judge me, I just knew it.

On my way out of the store, I realized that on Monday I had forgotten bread. My FAVORITE kind of bread is called Health Nut. It is called this because it is chock full of yummy grains and things. It is tasty. I buy it even though it is in that snobby double wrapped packaging. I don't care. It tastes good.

I ran to the back of the store, grabbed my Health Nut bread, and tossed it in my cart next to the Cool Whip and Oreos. I snagged a spot in line and started to check out.

I put my items on the belt. I am very conscious of the fact that people who bag groceries Just. Don't. Care. I don't blame them. Because of this, I make sure and put squishy things or things I don't want broken on the belt last. This means the grocery baggers don't actually have to think, and I don't end up with one huge lump of mashed bread.

So, of course, the last thing to go on the belt was my beloved Health Nut bread. The girl scanning my groceries was apparently paying more attention than I usually give credit to grocery store employees for paying, and when she picked up the bread and read the label she looked at it, then looked at my bags full of sugar and saturated fat laden foods, then looked at me with a face that said "Seriously? Nice Try."

The only thing I can compare it to is when you're standing behind that 300+ pound individual at any given fast food joint and you hear them say:
"I'll have a double bacon cheeseburger, a large fry, and an apple pie...Oh, and a Diet Coke."

Nice Try.

I thought about explaining myself. I thought about telling her that I am a devotee of fresh spinach and anything involving citrus. I thought about telling her how much fun the party was going to be because we were all going to act like little kids. Instead, I just smiled sheepishly and shrugged my shoulders.

I'm pretty sure there's no Safeway Inner Circle Club that I'll be denied membership from for trying to pose as a healthy eater when I'm a closet sugar addict. Even if there is...

Oh well.

Happy Friday to You and Yours!

8 comments:

JD said...

Similar to the defrosted broccoli and few strips of carrot they gave me with my full rack of ribs and mashed potatoes covered in cheese and bacon.

You are a mystery, Amanda. A walking contradiction.

Fran said...

That's like when Victoria went to the testing center and handed the guy her card and he said, "This isn't you. You need a whole lot more eyeliner and lipstick!" Do you remember that? He almost didn't let her take her test. Unbelievable that some people actually think you care what a stranger has to say about your life...ha ha!

Ashley Custer said...

I wouldn't have judged you - when the entire cart is filled with snack foods, you know it's for a party, so all health rules are expected to be thrown out the window. I judge when it's the everyday fare that's in there too, like massive amounts of frozen dinners and mac and cheese.

P.S. - I'm not a closet sugar addict; I'm loud and proud! Don't be ashamed!

MomAlicia said...

Love, Love, Love it! And you too! You made me giggle like crazy again! And I enjoyed the comments almost as much as the post. Thanks everyone.
We miss you honey and can't wait to see you in August. In the words of someone we all know and love, "We're going to rage!"

Linsy said...

That is freakin' hilarious!!! She's got a lot of guts to actually say whats on her mind... most people would use the "think it, don't say it." So, kudos to her! LOL I love your posts... i should comment more often. I love reading your blog!

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